A.A.A.D.D.

Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder

 

Do You Have A.A.A.D.D.?

Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decide to wash my car. As I start toward the garage,
I notice that there is mail on the hall table.
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk
mail in the trash can under the table,and notice that
the trash can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take
out the trash first. But then I think, since I'm going to
be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway,
I may as well pay the bills first. I take my checkbook
off the table, and see that there is only one check left.
My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go to
my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been
drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to
push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock
it over. I see that the Coke is getting warm and I
decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it
cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the coke a
vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye -- they
need to be watered.

I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my
reading glasses that I've been searching for all
morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk,
but first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the
glasses back down on the counter, fill a container
with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote.
Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will
be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that
it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in
the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the
flowers.

I splash some water on the flowers, but most of it
spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back down
on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember
what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:

the car isn't washed,
the bills aren't paid,
there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter,
the flowers aren't watered,
there is still only one check in my checkbook,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses, and
I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done
today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy
all day long, and I'm really tired. I realize this is a
serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it,
but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you?

Forward this message to everyone you know,
because I don't remember to whom it has been sent.

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!

GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY.

GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL

LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC

 

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Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder, growing old, adult humor, adult jokes, bathroom wall sayings